"what a feeling....

(...bein's believin'..." okay, so i'm not a welder by day/stripper by night. and if you're too young to understand that reference, you suck.)

anyway, i dropped by dr. fox's office today to pick up the third draft of my thesis from her. she thinks the content is solid and there are only a few minor revisions to make, and it's mostly for stuff i changed from the last draft: a semicolon instead of a comma, a letter that was accidentally capitalized...that kind of thing.

she commented that i looked more relaxed than ever. true. i had a good day today. a refreshing day.

this morning i met heather for coffee and a walk through upper bidwell park. we talked about defenses, work, life, and ambivalence. it's always nice to talk to heather. i wish i could attend her defense, or at least read her thesis. it's about museums and how some of them are going green. really interesting, timely, and relevant, and heather is a great writer. i really feel lucky that heather and i are friends. she and i started the program together, and, strangely enough, we are the second and third of our cohort to defend and get our M.A.s. whenever i think about and realize that, it surprises me. out of nine people, only three saw it through to the end. and the fact that i was one of the nine accepted into the grad program (of 22 applicants)...wow.

when i got here, the cohort's rundown was thus:
archaeology-helene (who knows?), jonathan (done), greg (dropped out)
physical anthropology-erica (dropped out; married greg), teresa (left to take a job with a coroner's office), alicia (dropped out to pursue art)
museum studies-heather (will be done), mike (left to get a law degree, but apparently has simultaneously been working on a thesis for museum studies at the same time. i don't know how that works--pursuing higher education and two different schools at the same time. i hate mike, by the way.), me (will be done)

no one was accepted to pursue cultural anthropology at the time.

we weren't a very social group. each subdiscipline tended to stick to their fellow people. heather, mike, and i didn't hang out though. mike was creepy, and heather seemed like she really knew everyone else. it wasn't until heather and i worked on an exhibit together that we really got to know each other. we worked on two other exhibits together after that, and have since had many, many classes and hit many, many milestones alongside each other.

she's always been there for me, and has always been very kind and open with me, and i feel like she cares, so i have always tried to be there for her as well. we call, write, and email each other a lot, so it's nice to know that we are able to keep in touch. i really value her friendship. when i left heather, it was hard knowing that i would never get another opportunity to go to her boyfriend keith's house to eat, or to her house to leave or pick things up from her porch, or have coffee with her. i (will) miss her.

anyway, today i also met up with my former roommate, rachel, who is now a special ed teacher at a school in yuba city. i don't really think i left chico on good terms with her, but it seems like she was okay with me, and we seemed to fall back into place. i mean, she wouldn't have met up with me if she hated me, right?

again, chico was a good place for me. i grew up here, in a way, and experienced a lot. i found out who i am. i met people, i lost people, i laughed, i cried. i had really wonderful moments, and i had a devastating moment.

i like chico as it is now. as it has been for the past four years. i don't want it to change. this place means a lot to me, and i can't believe that come the end of may, i might never have reason to come back here.